Coke Zero Fest 2009, Lourensford Estate

If I hadn’t gone to Coke Fest, I would have been cynical about it. Now that I have been, I am still cynical. I did not get out of bed yesterday thinking I would be at Coke Fest in the afternoon. But I was. This was my experience:

Yesterday, Easter Monday was Cokefest, or as some affectionately named it, Blowfest. What a very disappointing day in the sun. The best parts included meeting people I did not anticipate being there, sneaking into Golden Circle with blue wrist bands made of Bonaqua water bottle jackets (thanks Coca Cola) and eating greasy burgers with my hands and then not being able to wash them.

Ok, so there were also a couple of bands. I arrived for the last Dirty Skirts song. The final South African band followed them, aKing. I didn’t really listen to them. The aKing front man Laudo looks just like Seth Rogen from Knocked Up. (That’s just a freebie).

Panic at the Disco had vocal range. That’s it. Their genre is sickening, and I truly cannot tell the difference between them and Fall Out Boy. I was told I would enjoy them live nonetheless, but I didn’t. I think the organisers realised that we would get out of there before 10pm (due to two bands pulling out) and so they asked them to waffle and tell us about their time in South Africa and dedicate every song to a different person in the crowd or on stage.

Snow Patrol were surprisingly good. They played as it got darker. Lights began to have an affect and sing alongs were joined enthusiastically by a wearying crowd. Girls and small boys went on shoulders and fun was had by all.

At the interval, we made our move. We got our water bottles, folded the labels and bent them around our wrists. As good as could be. Three of us tried, two succeeded. I succeeded. My one friend’s band came off as showed it to the security, so he ran the other way. Hello Golden Circle!

Golden circle was fun. There was one character tripping on something. (I am sure there were many, but there was one making a scene.) He was bleak that we weren’t jumping around and crowd surfing to Oasis. “Come on Cape Town! Come on Cape Town! Come on Cape Town! Are you too cool to clap?” “Make some noise Cape Town!” Blond girls started mocking him. Dialogue ensued:

Blond Girl #1: “Come on Cape Town!”

Tripping guy: “Shut…..it!”

Blond Girl #2: “Shut up man!”

Tripping guy: “Go back to your girls’ school! Whatever girls’ school you are from, go back there. Go back to your girls’ school.”

Blond Girl #3: “What’s wrong with you?”

Tripping guy: “What girls’ school are you from? Hey? HEY?!! Go back there! Just go!!”

That went on for a while. Such a laugh. So, Oasis played some well known songs, some of Noel’s songs were a little foreign to me, but I knew Liam’s pretty well. What’s the story morning Glory?, Wonderwall and a host of timeless tunes. During Wonderwall I realised I lost my phone. I was not stoked about that.

A quick comparison that made a lot of difference: Snow Patrol seem to enjoy playing shows. Being on stage was fun for them. Oasis have been together since 1991. I think they are tired of performing. They look as though they are just going through the motions. I think a lot of people went there for Oasis and came away preferring Snow Patrol.

Let’s hope that the low calorie version that is Coke ZERO Fest does not repeat itself next year. That would be tragic. I didn’t awake this morning with the same, “I am too tired to get out bed” feeling, or the excitement of being able to talk about the rocking bands from last night’s show.